Emerging Leaders – Influencing Skills Online Course

Influencing Skills for Emerging Leaders  Online Course is now open for enrolment.

Visit this page to learn more about the course: learn.jasbindarsingh.com

You will learn about how to:

  • Better understand your stakeholder drivers so they can hear your message
  • Become clearer about you bring to the table and how to best complement your stakeholder needs
  • Engage better and build positive relationships with your customers, colleagues and other stakeholders quickly including remotely
  • Be more willing to have the courageous conversations you have been avoiding
  • Grow your confidence and step up in your career and as a person and leader
  • Build your emotional intelligence, including self-awareness and relationship skills

I am only accepting a small intake and the application deadline is the end of August. I am limiting numbers to make sure I end up with a small group of people who are as motivated as possible, so everyone has a valuable, transformative experience.

Once all the pilot spots or the application deadline ends, I won’t be taking any more students until the next cohort.

Here’s the link to enrol: learn.jasbindarsingh.com

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Your Well-Being is Paramount

The last few months, I have had conversations with clients, colleagues and friends who shared similar things. 

The common themes have been – dealing with change and transitions, navigating through the unknown, fear and uncertainty about the future, and feelings of stress, anxiety and depression. For managers and leaders, it has been about managing and leading through the unknown.

Given the current upheaval in the world, it is only natural that many of us are experiencing some pretty intense feelings and emotions.

Yes – even the most resilient ones amongst us have been affected.

This is quite normal.

We are in a situation of change and flux.  

In the business arena alone, we are confronting a range of scenarios.

Sadly, for some, the response is, “What business?’’ 

For many others, it is paddling hard just to stay afloat all; while still others have made this into a time of opportunity and possibilities and are doing really well personally and in business.

Whatever other stressors there were before, COVID – 19 was not one we had in the equation!

Be aware of your self-talk

With mental health and well-being high on the agenda for many now, I was taken back to my days of working in the mental health field as a clinical psychologist some decades back.

If you are experiencing some strong negative emotions, here’s a small step you can take to not compound matters.

Firstly, give yourself permission and accept your feelings and reactions – whatever they are – as being normal.

And secondly, be mindful to not overlay feeling bad about whatever it is that you are experiencing.

In other words, feeling bad about feeling bad!  

This only exacerbates the negative feelings such as worry, anxiety or depression.

In the current context of ambiguity, uncertainty and change, be mindful that you are not:

  • Being overly self-critical
  • Judging yourself harshly
  • Maintaining high expectations of self
  • Comparing yourself with those others who seem to be coping well
  • Wanting things to be back to ‘normal’
  • Getting in the grip of avoidant or other default unhelpful behaviours
  • Shutting off from others

Instead, cut yourself some slack and be kind to you – as YOU would be to your best friend.

Reach out and connect. Ask for that helping hand be it at work or from family and friends who love and care about you and your well-being.

The new normal

Give yourself permission to do things differently. 

Old rules may not apply.

Experiment but also do what works for you.  

This can also be a time for fresh beginnings. Ask yourself, “What do I, really, really want or need right now?”

Take good care of yourself especially with others relying on you for leadership and support.

As per the airline safety message before take-off (in the days we used to fly lots!), “Put your own oxygen mask first!”

Go well.

 

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

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What NOT to do in Influencing Your Stakeholders

Learning to influence our stakeholders with greater impact is even more critical now with many more of us working remotely.

Perhaps you can relate to this story about Amanda. I have changed her name for privacy reasons.

Amanda is a talented and bright emerging leader in her thirties.  She is fully engaged in her job and loves the company and what it stands for. Furthermore, she is respected and well-liked by her peers and colleagues. They see her as an approachable colleague and someone fun to work with.

The challenge Amanda has is her struggle to have her voice heard when it counts. When she has an important proposal to get across the line with her superiors, she loses confidence.

She feels that her ideas are not taken seriously despite knowing her area and the business so well.  Her thoughts and concepts get glossed over.

The final straw for her was with her last proposal.

This time Amanda felt pretty confident that her stakeholder – her manager – was going to ‘get it.’ In her mind, not only were the benefits obvious, but he also knew her well, including her passion, work ethics, strengths, and weaknesses.

However, this is not what happened when she presented her plan in his office.  He rejected it.  Yes – a rejection.  A definite NO!

Amanda was left feeling confused and somewhat crushed. Her dominant thought was, “Here we go again!” Her confidence knocked, she started doubting herself and her abilities.

So, what did Amanda miss?

She had assumed that her manager knew her so well, including her thinking on the issue and would, therefore, support her.

However, the manager’s current needs and priorities along with the bigger context the business was operating in were things that Amanda had overlooked.

By not taking this into account, her plan fell flat.

Can you relate to this?  Has this or something similar ever happened to you?

Have you ever been left confused as to why people above you, even your colleagues, could not see the value of what you were bringing to the table?

Your ideas and proposal got minimized or worse, discounted.

That is frustrating and disheartening.  It hurts.

You are left feeling that you are not a valued member of the team. You start doubting your abilities, even questioning your future commitment to the organization.

It may also leave you doubting your communication skills.  Moreover, your proposal is not as good as you think it is! You find yourself imprisoned in a downward spiral of self-criticism, doubts, and feelings of failure.

While these feelings are real and understandable, this is not the full picture.  There is a missing piece here as Amanda discovered during our conversation.

There is a more profound insight that will give you the results you want without you feeling like a failure and requiring them to ‘care more’ about what you are presenting.

Why?

Because there is a way that you can tap into what they already care about and what matters most to them.

Let me give you a crucial insight here and what needs to happen instead.

It is about having a greater awareness of yourself and your stakeholders.

For example, with your stakeholder – what do you know about their needs and priorities, their strengths and blind spots and the contextual pressures they have on them. Taking these into account will help place you in a more impactful position.

NEWSFLASH!

I am planning to share ideas in the form of an online course that will help you step up in your leadership, including your ability to influence more effectively.

Ideas which can position you as someone whose insights are respected, valued, and treasured.

You can begin to establish your role as someone who is a problem solver and solution provider.

This course will be open to a small group of participants.

Registrations will be limited to only 25 students.

The first five to register will get a BONUS copy of my expanded leadership development guide.

Keep an eye here, if you would like to register (or send us your email so we can be in touch).

 

P.S. Get your free copy of your Stakeholder Analysis Template. This will help you prepare well as you consider aspects from the perspective of your stakeholder before your presentation to them.

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How to Have Greater Leadership Impact


Do you sometimes struggle to get heard and taken more seriously?

Are you left questioning as to how you can influence your boss (or another stakeholder) more effectively?

Is influencing those you have to work with and yet have little authority over a challenge?
(Even more so now if you are working remotely!)

Is your more introverted nature getting in the way of you having your rightful ‘air time?’

Or perhaps the person you need to influence the most is yourself?

Well – these were the very statements made by over a hundred managers and emerging leaders in response to my question:

“What is a skill that you need the most in your leadership journey right now?”

These managers and leaders wanted to be acknowledged and taken seriously.

They wanted to grow their confidence and become better communicators and influencers. They wanted to be seen, recognised for their strengths and have a more significant leadership impact.

The more I heard about these issues, the more I thought about putting together a program that would let me help others using the experiences that I’ve had both personally and professionally.

As a female, growing up in an Indian family, I had to learn to find my voice.

Professionally – as a clinical and then an organisational psychologist, I have worked with both corporate and SME managers and leaders overcome their barriers and create greater leadership impact.

The feedback I received – as per above – led me to do some pilot courses designed to help upcoming managers and leaders who were eager, talented and motivated and who were keen to develop themselves.
So, let me pause here and check-in with you.

Bring a stakeholder to mind that you would like to influence the most.

With that stakeholder in mind, answer the following:

What do I need to learn that will help me the most in influencing them?

If you (or someone in your network) is interested in solving this problem, drop me a note and let me know if you would like more on this topic.

 

P.S. Get your free copy of your Stakeholder Analysis Template. This will help you prepare well as you consider aspects from the perspective of your stakeholder before your presentation to them.

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This will transform the way you coach

A heads up!

Are you enjoying the FREE WBECS Pre-Summit?

Who has been your favourite speaker?

I have certainly valued the insights I gained from the sessions that I attended.

If you’re interested in registering for the Full Summit, you can find out everything the Full Summit has to offer and secure your ticket at half off the regular price here.

WBECS has truly gone above and beyond with their package offerings this year.

The Super Early Bird price for the Full Summit is only available until June 25th. If you’d like to save 50%, up to $750 on their most popular Pro Coach Membership, I highly recommend you join now.

If you looking to create an even bigger impact for your clients, see better retention rates and consistently grow your coaching business then WBECS has all the resources you need to achieve just that!

Look forward to seeing you in some of the sessions.

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Career and Life Reflections


Photo by LinkedIn Sales Navigator on Unsplash

Covid-19 certainly upended our lives as we knew it. It caught us by surprise and struck us on many levels; some good and some challenging.

While some of us have returned to work; others have no work to return to.

It has raised more profound questions about what matters in life and how we could do and be better at work, home and in our communities.

This week I had several conversations with clients, colleagues and friends who highlighted the relevance of the message in my book, “Get Your Groove Back” – How Spiritual Intelligence (SQ) can give you the work and life you really want.

It brought back one of the most powerful memories for me some years after the book was launched. I was at an overseas conference and walking across the lobby for morning tea when a total stranger sidled up to me and whispered, “Your book saved my life!”

Seeing the surprised look on my face, he proceeded to explain that a Kiwi friend had sent him a copy and it was just what he needed during that challenging patch in his life.

If you are wondering about your next career and life steps, here are some reflective questions from the book, which might help.

Your life story 

  • What have been your greatest moments of fulfilment?
  • What would you choose as the three most critical choices in your life?
  • How have these defining moments impacted your sense of self and career?
  • If you were narrating your life story to someone, what sort of story would it be? What might be the title?
  • Is there an underlying theme in your story?
  • How have you changed in the last ten years?
  • How has your cultural background contributed to who you are?
  • What strengths have you discounted, taken for granted or underutilised?
  • What gives you a sense of being alive, excited and or grounded?
  • What things are changing in your life right now?
  • What are you welcoming, and what are you saying good-bye to?

Take care as you navigate your next steps.

For more guidance and to order a copy of “Get Your Groove Back” visit  – https://jasbindarsingh.com/shop/

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Develop Your Coaching in 2020

Greetings!

For the last seven years,  I have attended and promoted WBECS – the World Business and Executive Coach Summit and it has always proved to be a top learning opportunity.

WBECS is a live, online summit featuring over 40 of the most brilliant minds in coaching.

I’m a firm believer that continued education and growth are crucial for long-term success.

The world-class presenters at WBECS cover a wide range of topics in structured learning tracks including

  • Team Coaching
  • Coaching Methodologies
  • Remote coaching
  • Neuroscience and change
  • Leadership
  • Organisational development

The complementary free summit runs from 26 May to June 17. You are welcome to register for as many sessions as you’d like!

Here are just a few examples of the live sessions you can choose from when you join the complimentary Pre-Summit:

  • Michael Bungay Stanier – Easy Change vs Hard Change
  • Marcia Reynolds – Coaching Widespread Fear: Using Non-Reactive Empathy To Uplift Perspective
  • Gretchen Rubin – Understand Yourself (and Others) with the ‘Four Tendencies’ Personality Framework
  • David Peterson – Awareness in Action: Preparing Yourself — and Your Clients! — for a Better Future – Part 1
  • David Clutterbuck and Peter Hawkins – Coach-Led Q&A: Team Coaching with David Clutterbuck and Peter Hawkins

Plus so many more!

Interested? Then reserve your spot for the complimentary WBECS Pre-summit today!

(You can also register for the full summit which is a paid, longer learning experience spread between July 15 till April 2021).

I promise – you will find the WBECS summit incredibly valuable.

Please feel free to share this wonderful learning opportunity with others who you think will benefit from attending.

I look forward to seeing you there.

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Dealing with Covid-19 and beyond

I wrote this blog in the early days of the lockdown. However, given the sense of overwhelm in adjusting to our dramatically changed reality, adding another blog just did not feel right. But when several people mentioned that they hadn’t heard from me, I decided to re-visit and send this adapted piece.

And this is also my way of reaching out to you to say, “Hi– How are you going?”  (And please feel free to connect – I will be delighted to hear from you!!)

Here are some of my top of mind thoughts:

Physical and Mental Health

During these unprecedented time, when our world has suddenly upended, our physical and mental health has become the number one focus and taken centre stage. And so it should.  

After all, it is our health and well-being, which in turn contributes to our performance and productivity and impacting the economic bottom line.

With Co-vid 19, while there is much that is beyond us, including its future trajectory, the far-reaching economic and social impact and the timing of any new vaccine, there are things we can still control.

Here are some reminders of what we can do. Continue reading

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5 Leadership lessons from the All Blacks Defeat

© Photo: Andrew Cornaga / www.Photosport.nz

How thrilling it was watching the Rugby World Cup (RWC) held in Japan these past six weeks. As a nation, we felt proud of our boys – the incomparable All Blacks (Abs) in that famous black jersey. The possibility of a third consecutive RWC win loomed large.

But alas, it was not to be. In the semi-finals, the English team surprisingly put on a dominant performance which left the All Blacks with little possession and territory to perform their usual magic.

The shock and disappointment were compounded for many fans as their expectation for a strong second half revival failed to materialise.

And just like that, we were out of the running to bring the Webb Ellis Cup home again.

In the days following, we empathised with their pain and acknowledged their third-place win. We said goodbye to their exceptional coach, Steve Hansen, the captain – a great leader – Kieran Read and the other stalwarts such as Ben Smith, Ryan Crotty, Sonny Bill Williams and Matt Todd.

But here is the thing.

As a nation, while we did not get to see a third consecutive win, what we did get to witness was something even mightier – the character of the All Blacks.

Through their handling of defeat, the All Blacks culture and character shone through.

Here are five leadership lessons we can learn from them:

 1) Gracious in defeat 

Life brings many ups and downs, and we can’t always stay on top, no matter how smart, talented or skilled we are. Adversity does strike, and our mettle gets tested. It is not just how we perform when we are on top of our game, but what we do when we are in the depth of misery, disappointment and failure.

The All Blacks handled their loss with grace. Right after the game, despite feeling gutted both the coach and the captain were quick to front up and acknowledge how well the English team had played.

Despite their considerable pain, at that moment when it would have been easy to give in to churlishness, frustration and anger, they remained remarkably humble and grounded, giving credit where it was due.

In our business and personal life, we can certainly take a page out of this. How easy it is to feel sorry for oneself, make excuses, blame the other party and get angry when things do not go our way when the expected does not happen.

But this is not what we saw with the Abs.

2) Importance of reflection time

The All Blacks came together to reflect on what happened the day after and beyond that.

“I believe we lost because deep, deep, deep down in the pit of our guts, we did not have what the English had……Success is a cruel companion because what happens is that you never feel the pain that comes with a real big adversity….That for the next four years….It will be personal and that will make whatever they want even more important.” Steven Hansen in an interview with Gregor Paul in the NZ Herald. 

They then regrouped to come back to play in the third/fourth playoff game that got described as “a game that no team wants to play.”

The All Blacks fronted and played a good game against Wales. This was a bitter-sweet victory.

3) Expressing your feelings

The old mantra for men has been “Big boys don’t cry.” Again, the All Blacks reflected and showed that it is okay to demonstrate one’s grave sense of grief and loss. It is okay to feel the pain, and it is okay to let the tears out.

“Coach asked us all individually how we’re feeling,” said Smith. “There was a lot of pain there, a lot of honesty. You’ve got grown men pouring their hearts out and that’s shown real massive vulnerability,” Aaron Smith RWC 2019 News.

Healthy emotional expression is vital for our sense of well-being and wellness. Repressing and suppressing our emotions is not. The feelings we resist tumble out in inappropriate ways when we least expect them to.

“You’ve only got to look at the stats for New Zealand suicides and mental health and it’s not great. So allowing yourself to be vulnerable and show emotion is really important. We get called role models and I’m not so sure if we are or not. But if people want to call us role models I think it’s great that these guys are role modelling the fact that you can be emotional and vulnerable.” Steve Hansen in an article by David Long in Stuff.

Being able to feel and release painful emotions is what allows us to learn and grow.

It enables us to process, review, and move forward with lessons learnt, as did the All Blacks in the past week and no doubt, will continue to in the future.

 4) A culture of respect and trust

Steve Hansen and the coaching team have created a strong culture of respect and trust – a culture that allows honest conversations to take place, where mistakes are admitted to without penalty, and where constructive feedback is given and taken on board for improvement.

For players, what gives confidence is knowing that your back is covered. That you can count on your teammate to take that pass and shine by doing what they are good at; where egos don’t dominate and where you are playing not for yourself but for the team.

In the business world, we can do a lot better in fostering greater respect, inclusion and trust with those we share so much of our time – our colleagues and customers.

5) Showing character

“The most important thing we can do now is show that if your character’s tested, you can stand up to it. That’s the greatest success we can take out of this tournament, the greatest success we can show young people in New Zealand who are aspiring All Blacks or aspiring to be anything. You’ve got to have character.” Steve Hansen RWC 2019 News

Being able to show humility and dignity in the face of adversity is a sign of character; to stay committed to the truth no matter what and to show integrity.

The Abs had the honesty to accept where they did not measure up. No matter how raw it was, in their de-brief, they were able to own up to their part in their defeat.

Underpinning all this is another hallmark of character and excellence – the desire to keep improving. Unlike other teams, they have managed to stay at the top for many years because they have the constant mantra to keep improving and to strive for excellence.

What ultimately sets an individual, team or organisation apart is having a sound set of values which serve as an ethical compass.   This helps us navigate a sure pathway through any disappointment, loss and failure.

In their defeat, the All Blacks have shown how to stand up with humanity, integrity and character – a winning combination and inspiration for us all.

 

P.S. If you would like to read more articles by me, you can also follow me as per above or sign here for your free monthly newsletter for further articles on careers, leadership, personal and professional development. 

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Influence Skills Survey

The ability to influence and effect change in your stakeholder’s thinking, behaviour and actions is a core leadership skill.  As a manager and leader, to be able to inspire, motivate, and communicate with clarity and conviction towards a common goal and get others on board is priceless.I need your help.

I am doing a short survey on leadership influence and would really value your input.  

Here is the link:  https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/DGYJD7C

Your time and feedback are much appreciated and as thank you, you will go in the draw for a complimentary laser coaching session with me (should you wish to take this up).

I look forward to your feedback.

Many thanks
Jasbindar


P.S. Photo by Rebrand Cities from Pexels

P.P. S. If you would like to read more articles by me, you can also follow me as per above or sign here for your free monthly newsletter for further articles on careers, leadership, personal and professional development. 

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